Saturday, December 25, 2010
p.s. Few years ago someone connected my blog to facebook and made it that every post goes directly to facebook as a note and now I don't know how to change it. The point is that my blog is almost like my diary and not everyone would want to read it. But be patient, I will find a way. Peace.
Thursday, November 25, 2010
The rest of the story we all know. We all know it too well, I would say. We know it by looking at the world we live in. We know it by looking at the faces of the people around us. Those tired eyes, those empty looks. The sadness and despair, the pain of a hope killed. Signs that something went wrong long ago. Perhaps, we know it by looking in the mirror.
And in the attempt to win back their dignity, to gain back their real, their lost self, people fight against each other. They fight physically and they fight mentally. Those who are stronger control the ones that are weaker, thinking that through that they become something special, that they have their dignity. Those who are smarter manipulate the ones that are simpler, not knowing that they are in the same boat. The boat that floats on the river called hopelessness.
But the road to dignity is not the road of achievement. Is not the road of success or people saying good things about you or applauding you. It's the road of honesty. Being honest that you don't have it all together. That you need help. Honest to yourself and honest to God. Then he will start a process, then he will do what he knows how to do best. There is hope for dignity.
Monday, November 15, 2010
Monday, November 01, 2010
When babies are born they are cool. But as they start growing they steal your heart and you end up loving them more and more. The other night I was putting Nathan to bed and praying for him and asking God for dreams from him when I stopped and wondered. "Who knows what kind of dreams the Lord gives to little children?" Immediately I started thinking, trying to find a theological answer or explanation, but then I thought that I shouldn't, cause only God know that, and whatever it is, it must be beautiful. Why should I try to limit by logic the limitless, colorful and spacious spirit of imagination that flows wherever he wishes.
These are the last days of us being three people family. In a little while (it can be even tonight) another member of our family will arrive. We don't know what's he going to look like, we don't know much about him (almost nothing), but he is welcomed. He is part of the family. Just recently I started walking with Nathan by my side, holding him by the hand, and the feeling is amazing. Or I would rather say quietly fulfilling. And walking with two sons, one at each side...I can't wait.
For a long time I want to write an article about the love that produces new life being the highest love that humans can know and I think I will soon. People might disagree on that one but that is my conviction.
Intentional growth. Organic and spontaneous growth is ok, but there is an element of intentional growth that people need. You can grow by spending time with God, or listening to sermons, or reading the Bible, but you also need other people that will challenge you, that will impart to you. So if you want to change and grow, put some intention to it, find someone, be teachable, be ready to receive, ask questions, be humble, be hungry to learn. And if you think that you know it...I feel sorry for you.
The other day I saw an artistic movie called "Baraka" which portrays the world we live in, and the people in it, without words, just with picture and music. After that I just felt a confirmation that I want to spend the rest of my life helping people to be free and find their lost dignity in God through Jesus Christ. That is my passion, that is my life.
Thursday, October 28, 2010
Запомни дека хаику е поезија на секојдневието, и дека секојдневието е неговото подрачје.
Внимателно набљудувај ги нештата од природата...ќе ти се откријат невидени чуда.
Идентификувај се (толкувај се преку) со својот субјект, што и да е тоа: Тоа си ти – “Тат твам аси”.
Размислувај во самотија и во спокој за своите белешки за природата.
Не издавај го Качеството на нештата- природата треба да биде предадена токму онаква каква што е.
Изрази го своето чувство преку синтакса природна за англискиот јазик. Не пишувај се во јапонскиот 5, 7, 5 облик, оти тоа на англиски честопати предизвикува подметнување и вештачко дотерување.
Настојувај да пишуваш во три стиха, со приближно седумнаесет слога.
Употребувај само обичен јазик.
Сугерирај, ама погрижи се на читателот да му дадеш доволно, оти хаику што заматува е промашено.
Кога-годе можеш спомени го годишното време, оти тоа додава димензии. Запомни дека годишното време може да биде одредено со предмет или со знаци на песната.
Никогаш не употребувај нејасни алузии – хаику се интуитивни, не се интелектуални.
Не превидувај го хуморот, ама избегнувај обична шега.
Римата и другите поетски средства никогаш не треба да бидат толку очигледни што ќе го засенуваат градивото.
Живодарноста, не убавината, тоа е вистинското својство на хаику.
Никогаш не жртвувај си ја јаснотијата на твојата интуиција за извештаченост: изборот на зборови треба да биде насочуван од значењето.
Читај ја секоја песна на глас, оти незабележаното вештачко дотерување секогаш ќе се чуе.
Имај го на ум советот на Торо – “Поедностави! Поедностави! Поедностави!”
Остани при секоја песна додека не го задоволи она што сакаш да го изразиш.
Запомни го предупредувањето на Р.Х.Блајт дека е хаику прст што покажува кон месечнината, и ако е дланката украсена со скапоцености, веќе не го гледаме она што го покажува прстот.
Sunday, October 17, 2010
Listen to a story that is not a story but a true account of John the Apostle preserved in memory. After the tyrant's death (the emperor), he returned from the island of Patmos to Ephesus and used to go, when asked, to the neighboring Gentile districts to appoint bishops, reconcile churches, or ordain someone designated by the Spirit. Arriving at a city near by (Smyrna), he settled disputes among the brethren and then, noticing a spirited youth of superior physique and handsome appearance, commended him to the appointed bishop with the words, "I leave this young man in your keeping, with Christ as my witness".
When John returned to Ephesus, the churchman brought home the youth entrusted to his care, raised him, and finally baptized him. After this he relaxed his oversight, having put the seal of the Lord on him as the perfect safeguard. But some idle and dissolute youths corrupted him with lavish entertainment and then took him with them when they went out at night to commit robbery or worse crimes. Soon he joined them and, like a stallion taking the bit in mouth, he dashed off the straight road and down the precipice. Renouncing God's salvation, he went from petty offenses to major crimes and formed the young renegades into a gang of bandits with himself as chief, surpassing them all in violence and bloody cruelty.
Time passed, and John paid another visit. When he had finished his mission, John said, "Come now, Bishop, return the deposit that Christ and I left in your keeping with the church as witness". At first the bishop was dumbfounded, thinking that he was being dunned for funds he had never received. But John said, "I am asking for the young man and his soul".
"He is dead", groaned the old man, in tears.
"How did he die?"
"He is dead to God. He turned out vile and debauched: an outlaw. Now he is in the mountains, not the church, with an armed gang of men like himself".
The apostle tore his clothing, beat his head, and groaned, "A fine guardian I left for our brother's soul! But get me a horse and someone to show me the way". He rode off from the church, just as he was. When he arrived at the hideout and was seized by the outlaws' sentries, he shouted, "This is what I have come for: take me to your leader!" When John approached and the young leader recognized him, he turned and fled in shame. But John ran after him as hard as he could, forgetting his age, and calling out, "Why are you running away from me, child - from your own father, unarmed and old? Pity me, child, don't fear me! I will give account to Christ for you and, if necessary, gladly suffer death and give my life for yours as the Lord suffered death for us. Stop! Believe! Christ sent me".
The young man stopped, stared at the ground, threw down his weapons, and wept bitterly. Flinging his arms around the old man, he begged forgiveness, baptized a second time with his own tears, but keeping his right hand hidden* (*As unworthy of forgiveness for all the bloodshed it had caused). John, however, assured him that he had found forgiveness for him from the Savior. He prayed, knelt down, and kissed that right hand as being cleansed through repentance. Then he led him back and did not leave him until - through prayer, fasting, and instruction - he had restored him to the church: a great example of true repentance and regeneration, the trophy of a visible ressurection.
Friday, October 08, 2010
Many people pray and many people pray for stupid things. Why? Cause they don't know the One they are praying to? In prayer, the key thing is to know who do you pray to. Your picture of the One you pray to will define how you pray and what you ask in your prayers. My theory is this. You pray for what is important to you. Those things that you ask for, in prayer, expose what is important for you and what you value in life. Many prayers are selfish. Does that mean that we are selfish? Oh, yes, we are.
Prayer is important. Or better said, prayer is essential. Prayer is not a technicality, prayer is a breath. Prayer is not a duty, it's not an obligation, it's not something that you have to do. Prayer should be something you want to do. Prayer is a safe place, a hiding place when you are afraid, but prayer is also a place of passion, of tears, of pain, of loud cries, of expectation and strong desire...
So let's get to know the One that we pray to more, let's allow him to change our hearts which will change our prayers. And then...let's pray.
Saturday, October 02, 2010
"Let’s be absolutely clear about this, 10 years on, we are here to change the world. We are that naïve, we are that idealistic and the reason that we want to change the world it’s the same reason why we started. The vision is Jesus. And until he is the most loved, most listened to, most respected person on earth, until heaven comes to earth, until we are living in the very dream for which he created us, we gonna keep fighting. We gonna keep praying, we gonna keep serving, we gonna keep binding up our broken bones, and mopping up our tears, and caring for people. The vision is Jesus, 10 years on. I’m so thrilled that that hasn’t changed. There could be no greater vision, there could be no one else on whom to spend your life, there could be no one else worth your life than Jesus Christ who laid his life down for us. So, if you can find a greater cause, go follow it, but if you can not, I urge you, don’t waist your life just playing games but give your life to the greatest cause of all, who is the greatest name of all, Jesus Christ. So if you are with me, let’s change the world for his glory. That’s what it’s about".
Friday, September 24, 2010
Monday, September 06, 2010
My point is not to comment about the book (which is great) or retell it, but about the way he writes about such a serious and painful subject. What struck me is that there is not a judging and condemning tone in his writing. No, he is writing with a hidden irony and sarcasm that you don't see and on the surface he just describes the lives and the backgrounds of the prisoners, but inside there is something happening in you when you read that. You are hit by the reality that they serve their 10 or 25 years (mostly for offenses they "intended" to commit) knowing that at any moment they could get 10 or 25 more and spend their whole life in prison. I guess that's the mastery of his writing which I really admire.
After that I read his first novel which first drew the attention of the public called "One Day In The Life Of Ivan Denisovich" which is much shorter and not so complex. And again, when I read the book I felt that there is nothing special about it but when I finished it, it hit me. The reality of the life in the labor camps. Here are the closing lines of that book.
He covered his head with the skimpy, grubby blanket and stopped listening to the zeks from the other half crowding in between the bunks to be counted.
Shukhov felt pleased with life as he went to sleep. A lot of good things had happened that day. He hadn't been thrown in the hole. The gang hadn't been dragged off to Sotsgorodok. He'd swiped the extra gruel at dinnertime. The foreman had got a good rate for the job. He'd enjoyed working on the wall. He hadn't been caught with the blade at the search point. He'd earned a bit from Tsezar that evening. And he'd bought his tobacco.
The end of an unclouded day. Almost a happy one. Just one of the 3,653 days of his sentence, from bell to bell.
The extra three were for leap years.
Friday, August 27, 2010
But as I walked on the street few days ago a thought came to me. How different this is from killing the same kind of animal in the factory and then eat it as a hamburger or a steak? I will not give an answer, I'm just asking.
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
For example, God told them that every seventh year they should cancel the debts of the debtors, let the captives go free, not glean the fruits of the harvest so the poor can eat and so on. Basically God wanted everyone to be provided for. Not the rich to get richer and the poor to get poorer. If that was ever worked out practically it's another question.
Also, all through the Bible God speaks against usury, taking financial advantage of those who are in bad situation and need to borrow money, meaning giving them money that needs to be payed back with interest.
But what about the banks in our modern society? What about the way they work and the foundations they are built upon? They are such a normal part of our urban life that we fail to see on which foundations they are built. Their basic function is to lend people money and take it back with interest.
Christians would say that some jobs are not suited for those who follow Jesus. Let's say that christians should not work in sex-shops, casinos, strip-clubs, and that's ok. But what about banks? When we hear that someone works in a bank do we see him as an achieving person, a person with a good job, or a person who serves the spirit of money and greed? I'm not giving any conclusions here, I'm just asking.
Thursday, July 08, 2010
Recently, during an international gathering I attended, one canadian guy commented something about St. Francis of Assisi. He said that when people tried to judge his works they couldn't trace them to any previous source of inspiration like artists or writers that worked before him. He was unique in his own way. He was also considered as the forerunner of the Renaissance, which is no small thing. About his inspiration being found in God there is no need to talk.
Of course we are all influenced by the things around us and it's hard to say that someone is completely unique and that creates something which no one has seen before. That's not the point. I think that there is something when you just want to create to glorify God and you are free from the pressure to impress people. It's like the creativity (that comes from the Creator himself) can easily flow through you. I think it's a real challenge to spend time with God and let him be the primary source of our inspiration and not the opinions of others. True creativity is found in your real self, your real self that only God can reveal to you.